Last Chance

As a reminder, today will be your last chance to check out my MySpace blog before I delete it. Here is the link to that. Otherwise, enjoy the final "highlights" below:

Friday, January 26, 2007

I'm Aqua Man! Current mood:click on the links I got home yesterday and went to put my audit bag in my room like I always do. As I passed by Milkshake Strawberry's fish bowl I took a look in. I normally don't pay much attention, because she is a fish and it is unnatural for me to a fish around me without my hook in its mouth. But for some reason I did look yesterday and Milkshake Strawberry wasn't there. She has jumped out of the bowl in the past, but the rest of the family had been gone for a couple of hours so I feared the worst. After looking closer, I noticed her motionless body laying on top of the desk next to the back of the bowl. As I reached for her, she jumped off the desk and fell about 5 feet onto the carpet. I gathered her up and returned her to her home (catch and release, just like in the wild). She seems to be fine now. It was a good thing I saw her when I did, because the rest of the family wasn't scheduled to come back any time soon. I don't know why I checked on her, but my theory is that I have some special ability to sense where fish are(sort of like Aqua Man). That would explain why I catch so many fish. I think the fish community is going to have some sort of a parade in my honor now. Is it still called a parade if it involves boats? It should, because there are floats in a parade, and not many things float better than boats.

Friday, February 02, 2007

Where's Bill Murray? Current mood:Devin Hester! As a part of the continuing celebration of Black History Month, today is Ground Hog's Day. I don't really know what the connection is between the two, but suspect it has something to do with the shadow. The ground hog didn't see his shadow today, which means that we avoided 6 more weeks of Winter. I really don't know how a ground hog ended up with the power to make that decision or how accurate the whole process is, but I welcome anytime we can rely on an animal to predict the weather. They couldn't be any worse than a meteorologist. The evening news would be more entertaining if you had various weather predictions listed on different cards and then a platypus would wobble over and pick one up. It would definitely save the news station money on that Doppler 800,000+. I've been reading The Indian in the Cupboard to Skyler. I think I had to read it in like fourth grade. I found it in a box while organizing my garage and wanted to read it again. It isn't the easiest read in the world. From what we have read so far, it seemed to me that it was written by a Brit. After looking it up this morning, my suspicions were confirmed. Lynne Reid Banks is from London, and apparently still living. The main character's name is Omri, which seems pretty cool to me. It has been made into a movie, which I plan on watching with Skyler when we are done. She seems to enjoy it so far, but it took a little while for her to accept that Little Bear was an Indian and not the cartoon bear she is familiar with. It would be an interesting twist if the cupboard did turn things into cartoon bears though. Random recollection: I met a guy at church a few years back who said he wrote animal novels. I wasn't sure if that meant he wrote books to read to your pets or if they were just about animals. When I asked him he gave me some long answer that almost lulled me to sleep. I don't recall what the actually answer was, but based on that conversation I assume that the books are to help people and pets fall asleep. I did go by his home for some reason and his dogs helped reinforce my fear of dogs.

Thursday, February 08, 2007

They get an unlimited supply of Tang! Current mood:basketball There are a couple of interesting things happening in the news right now. The whole astronaut diaper thing is a little bizarre, but at least it may bring back some good Tang jokes. Speaking of Tang, I used to love drinking the maracuya flavored Tang in Ecuador. I have been unsuccessful in obtaining that flavor in the states. In my current search I have noticed that there is a new passion fruit flavor, but haven't been able to find it anywhere. O.K. that's enough Tang for now. Maybe I'm crazy, but I remember when the Space Shuttle launch and landing used to be a big event. I think they go up there all the time now. I remember that we watched that one blow up while we were sitting in class in elementary school. It was one of the few times we got to watch T.V. in school. I think there is also some sort of opportunity to use the "it doesn't take a rocket scientist" line here too. My favorite current story in the news is about John Amaechi. To celebrate Black History Month he decided to announce that he was gay. I'm really happy about Black History Month too, but I don't know why he needs to write a book about it. Wait….He must mean the other kind of gay. This story really interests me, but not because of the whole gay thing. One of the funniest things in the world to me is to hear black people speak with an English accent. It gets me every time. That is part of what makes the Teletubbies enjoyable. There is always a chance that some black Brit is going to be beamed through Tinky Winky's belly talking about bloody knickers and tea. We won't be seeing any black red coats on Lost any time soon. I watched last night and still get the sense that the writers don't know how they are going to tie everything together. All that happened last night was that they gave us another storyline about another character. I'm really losing my patience with the show. There was a summary show on before the new episode. I tried to watch that, but all the writers were trying to do was convince us that the island wasn't as important as the stories about the characters. So I guess we are just supposed to forget about the smoke monster and the polar bears and the ship wreck up in the mountains. I am losing interest quick, but could easily be entertained again if Ponch ended up on the island some how. Maybe he is trying to sell some island property on T.V. and just happens to get stuck on the island. That would be pretty awesome.

Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Let me clarify, again Current mood: full We had dinner with some friends last night at P.F. Changs (The P.F. stands for pricey food). We get to the end of dinner and our waiter brings out the fortune cookies. Here is the fortune that I pulled out: "An admirer is concealing his affection for you." I don't know why I have to keep expressing this, but I am not gay. Sure, I listen to Morrissey, am very clean, and have a strange appreciation of Ponch. That doesn't make me gay. However, I can understand why someone would be desirous of me. I wish there was a switch to turn off my good looks and charm, but it doesn't exist. So, to my male secret admirer, I am very flattered by your concealed affection, but that is as far as it is going to go. I hate to disappoint you, but I am sure that there is still somebody else out there for you. Good luck with that.

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Disabled Current mood:abled The other day I noticed a van parked in a lot that had a whole lot of extra buttons near the dash. Through my super sleuthing abilities I figured out that it was set up for a person in a wheel chair to drive it. Some may think that this would be a scary thought knowing that people who don't have control over their whole body are behind the wheel of motor vehicles, but I think they have more experience getting a vehicle around than most drivers. Sure, they have to use their teeth to turn on their turn signal, but how many of us don't do that? There seemed to be a ton more buttons than necessary to drive a van though. Maybe they had a lot of other cool stuff in the van, like a blender to make smoothies while they drive. I've always wondered about the parking situation at the Special Olympics. Can they designate the whole lot as handicapped parking? What about the non-cappers? They probably have to park very, very far away. Upon continued contemplation, I remember that there is a recklessly blind lady in our office towers. I call her recklessly blind, because she hardly ever uses her walking stick and she definately needs to. I had to catch a big vase that she knocked over one morning. Had I not been there, it would have resulted in a huge mess. Maybe she gets tired of using the stick, but I notice her not using it a bunch, and I am sure that it results in her bumping into things all the time. Maybe if I were blind, I would be reckless too?

Thursday, May 31, 2007

Randomness Current mood: groggy I don't vote, but if I did, I would never vote for Hilary Clinton. I don't trust any woman who won't drop her last name for her husband's. I don't know if ubiquity is a word, but it should be. You really don't hear much from Ashford and Simpson these days. Kobe is the new T.O. I wish they could make miniature pandas at an affordable price. I've seen enough of Dane Cook to know that I don't think he is very funny. I miss Mitch Hedberg. I would like to challenge an oil executive to a dance off, with the loser paying for the winner's gas for a year. They would get served! I liked it better when you could sort MySpace Music by number of downloads. Are there big wheel races for adults anywhere? Tupac is either still alive, or somebody who sounds like him is making a lot of money. I miss the magazine rack at Tower Records. Bingo on T.V.? Really? Kung Fu Hustle is way better than Shaolin Soccer. Passion Fruit was appropriately named. Jerry Stiller is a comedic genius. There should be no speed limit in the carpool lane. Instead of indecent exposure, if the person is hot, they should call it decent exposure. Backyard BBQ Chunky Soup is delicious. They are running out of time to make the A-Team movie, because there is nobody else who could play B.A. Architects should play Jenga to see who gets a building contract. I think Brawny could totally take The Green Giant.

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

Goin' Fishin' Current mood:catching I'm sure I don't have to remind you Californians, but this Saturday(June 9th) is one of two "Free Fishing Days" in California. What does this mean? It means that you can go fishing without a license. It also means that I am taking some of our church's youth fishing on Saturday. I will not reveal the location that we are headed to, because I don't want anybody trying to steal our fish (plus, I still haven't really decided.) It has been over a year since I fished in our lovely state, so it is well overdue. We will be fishing some sort of stream or creek, since that is my specialty, and I can't stand sitting around while I wait for fish. To get in the fishing frame of mind I popped in an old video of Idaho and me fishing up in Utah. It was great to relive the times of taking "The White Stallion" out in the wilderness and getting lost in the environment for hours. I love living in California, but I sure do miss fishing in Utah. I also miss hanging out with Idaho (If you are currently questioning my sexuality, see a previous blog of mine to clarify how gay I am not). Idaho and I were missionary companions and then we met up again when we both went to BYU. We used to go fishing pretty much on a weekly basis. Since that time a lot has happened and we have been out of touch for a few years. Maybe one day in the future we will have a fishing reunion? Speaking of reunions, yesterday I was reunited with Ponch trying to sell me real estate on T.V. I was just flipping around the limited number of stations we get and happened to notice him. It was surprising that Kenji didn't automatically Tivo him, until I noticed the three red thumbs down at the top of the screen. To explain to you non-Tivoers, You can rate the shows that you watch to help Tivo suggest other shows to you. The remote has a green thumbs up button and a red thumbs down button. You can give programs a rating from 3 thumbs up to 3 thumbs down. Then Tivo will record similar programs based on your ratings when it isn't already scheduled to record. Sara obviously tried to sabotage Ponch from being broadcast in our home, so I may have done a little adjusting to some of her shows. How dare she deny me of Ponch! (Once again, I feel the need to state that I am very much in love with my female wife and am not attracted to other men.) I saw a blind man crossing the street last week. He was walking with his stick in front of him, like blind people should. However, there was a car that had just missed the light and was in the middle of the crosswalk. So, I got to witness the blind man hitting the car over and over again with his stick, trying to figure out what was blocking his path and how to get around it. It brought a smile to my face.

Tuesday, August 07, 2007

The Weekend Current mood: tired This weekend was uneventfully entertaining. My Friday began with someone calling my cell phone and asking for someone named Luis. When I told them they had the wrong number they said, "no I don't" and continued to stay on the line as if I was going to magically transform into Luis. So, I hung up and got about three more calls from Luis' acquaintance. Here is his phone number in case anyone else wants to Alex Wang him: (814) 459-3085. In case you are not familiar with the verb Alex Wang, here is a description. When I was a young lad, and before cell phones became functional and affordable there were things called pagers. Alex Wang was a real estate agent where we grew up. He decided to include his pager number on the notepads he left on our porch. So, we would page him with other people's phone numbers multiple times a day over a very long period of time. Alex was very dedicated, and never seemed to pass up a potential sale. He would call the number on his pager and say, "This is Alex Wang. Did you page me?" He would do it over and over again. This caused David Guzman's mother hours of fun. Technology has taken away some easy entertainment. Remember the good old days of prank calls? We used to randomly pick out names in the phone book and tell them they just won money from the Mighty 690. Then caller i.d. and *69 came along. I'm sure all the Richard Heads in the phone book were grateful for those advances in technology, but I'm not too stoked. You used to even be able to call your own phone. We found that out the hard way when we decided to prank call the number written on the phone in my grandparent's den. My father's voice on the other end of the line was an unpleasant surprise. I watched The Bourne Identity over the weekend and really enjoyed it. I thought I would be disappointed, because other people had hyped it up for me. But it was really good. I could relate to him not remembering. Kevin and Bean were talking about The Bourne Ultimatum this morning and they had people call in who suffer from amnesia. The majority of them had their amnesia after some traumatic event. After my head trauma, I don't recall the event that caused it and some things that happened around that time are real hazy for me.

Will Blog For Food

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Pimp my coaster Current mood:spurloinky I can't recall if I have mentioned it before, but I find homeless people to be interesting. There is a guy who I pass by almost every day on my way to work. He is right on the corner of Hill off of the 210 West exit. He and I will make eye contact almost every time, and a lot of the time I just miss the light so we compete in this bizzaro staredown until the light changes. I have a lot of questions I want him to answer. His sign says, "Homeless. Please Help". I want to know why it mentions nothing about working. He looks to be about 10 years older than me. The penmanship seems rather good, so I wonder if he made the sign himself. I wondered if he would like a larger sign, but it does have some folds in it so I think he keeps it in his pocket. He seems very clean for a homeless person and is usually well shaven also. Where is he cleaning himself up at if he doesn't have a home? I also notice him smoking every so often and don't understand how he can afford cigarettes if he is homeless. I got to a point where I was ready to ask him his name, and then my window broke. To be more accurate the device that lowers and raises my window broke. So, I would have to open my door to carry on a conversation with him. I don't want to scare him, so I will wait until that gets fixed, but it would be nice to at least know his name so I could greet him by name in the mornings. We'll have to wait and see.

Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Ready for Black History Month Current mood:Lance Briggs is a beast! Tomorrow marks the beginning of Black History Month. I know about all the jokes that it is the shortest month of the year, so keep those to yourselves. I'm not aware of White History Month, but maybe I am just out of the loop. I don't know how to celebrate Black History Month, but will research it in the next couple of days and keep you posted. I noticed a homeless person on my drive this morning who had a shopping cart (which seems to be the preferred mode of transportation for the homeless, kind of like a no-budget motorhome) filled with his or her (it was hard to tell) belongings. Sitting on top of this 8 foot high mobile storage unit was a dog. The homeless person had taken on a pet! I think that if you are homeless and you decide to get a pet, you have pretty much come to terms with being homeless. It seems like the desire to overcome poverty is no longer involved. Maybe they are now comfortable being homeless. I guess they wouldn't have to worry too much about feeding the dog, because the dog was probably already surviving on the streets. Now that I think about it, there is the possibility that this person had the dog as a pet before becoming homeless. That would be a very supportive dog to stick around. I wonder if it had a dog house before and is now a homeless dog? I thought I heard someone on T.V. say that L.A. is the homeless capital of the country, but don't know the facts involved with that statement.

Thursday, February 01, 2007

It's Black History Yo! Current mood:Thomas Jones! Today is the first day of Black History Month and in my brief study of how to celebrate this month it occurs to me that the first thing I need to do is learn about Black History. Two good websites I have found to help with this are: History.com and Biography.com Check these two sites out for now to learn about the invention of the "Jenny Coupler" and many other great Black accomplishments. Ironically, gangsta rap was not invented by a Black person, but by a Jewish man named Adirondak Steiner. I'll update you with more knowledge about how to celebrate as I obtain it. I saw the homeless guy on Hill again this morning and almost opened my door to talk to him. I now have a goal to fix my window. Having to open the door at drive-thru's and to swipe my parking pass twice a day at work wasn't enough to get me to fix it, but I can't keep going on without knowing his name. As I saw him today, I remembered that there was a homeless guy in the movie Bruce Almighty. The message on his cardboard sign changed throughout the movie and I think it would be a good idea to make up signs with the same messages for the homeless guy on Hill. Then he could rotate them and keep the regular passers-by interested in his plight. I wonder how many people would catch on? Now I have to find out what it said on those signs. I wonder how difficult it will be to convince him to abandon his "Homeless, please help" sign for a while. Maybe I should get to know his name first. I saw the homeless pet owner again this morning. The dog was still on top of the stack. There was a homeless guy who I used to see quite a bit on Colorado. He was usually shirtless and had a walkman. He would start randomly busting a move on different street corners. It was enjoyable to watch the reaction of the other pedestrians. I haven't seen him in a while though. Perhaps he found a home.

Friday, February 02, 2007

Where's Bill Murray? Current mood:Devin Hester! I saw the homeless guy again this morning. It seems like I get stopped at that light every morning. I haven't been there on the weekend to see if he only has a five day work week too, but I bet he doesn't take much time off. However, I don't notice him on my drive home, so maybe it is a 40 hour week spread out over 7 days. I feel like I should bring him something for breakfast when I finally ask him his name. Maybe a breakfast bar or something. The timing of the light has to be pretty good to carry on any type of conversation with him, but based on my past encounters it shouldn't be too hard.

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Booker T. Washington Current mood:sore Well, I hope this morning isn't an indication of how my day is going to be. As I exited the freeway at Hill I didn't see the homeless guy. Since he wasn't there, I looked to the car on my right just in time to see an old guy shove his finger up his nose. I turned away just before he pulled out his buried treasure. I did do my research on the homeless guy's signs in Bruce Almighty. Here they are: R EWE BLIND LOOK TO YOURSELF LIFE IS JUST THY KINGDUMB COME ALL FOR WON GOD BEE GOOD HONEY Bruce: (with his own sign) WHATEVER HE SAID -> ARMAGEDDON OUTA HERE I seem to remember them being much more entertaining in the movie. Maybe I will come up with some of my own. I keep jumping ahead of myself though. I still haven't introduced myself to the guy.

Rewind

Thursday, August 03, 2006

It's almost Friday Current mood:I secretly enjoy watching Big Brother I typed a couple of paragraphs and then it disappeared. Myspace has been sucking lately, or is it just me? We received a letter today from Skyler's future school (I know, I can't believe she is old enough to go to Kindergarden already either. In Ecuador they just call it Kinder, which I think comes from Germany, so that is what I am going to call it from now on too. Coincidently, Kinder is also a german producer of delicious chocolates. You can find out more about them hereKinder Chocolate. Their chocolate eggs with toys inside are awesome.) I seem to have diverted off topic. So we get a letter from Kinder that describes the dress code and mentions that the kids are supposed to wear uniforms. Sara and I are both vehemently opposed to making kids wear uniforms, especially in public school. I am sure that some geek-wad has done "research" about how beneficial uniforms are, but I am not buying it. I think that clothing allows for self-expression and a chance to develop individuality. Of course, the school sells the uniforms, which I'm sure is only done out of convenience to the parents. (I don't think that the sarcasm was apparent in the last sentence). I guess they want to keep the kids from sporting their gang colors. I didn't know that the gangs were recruiting so young. Uniforms must be a better solution than me sitting down and telling Skyler not to join the Kinder Klux Klan or the Kinder Crips. Although, the school colors are blue, so I think I will try and steer her toward the Crips. Beware of 5 year old thugs.

Monday, August 21, 2006

7 Years! Current mood:I like saying, "Fire Crotch!" Today marks seven years since Sara agreed to a life of everlasting Joshua. I have no doubt that she is perfect for me. Here is an example as to why. This is a recent conversation that Sara and I had: Joshua: I was at work today and saw what looked like a Dad's root beer candy in the hallway. So I picked it up and opened it. Sara: It was in the hallway of your office or of the building? Joshua: Of the building. Sara: (rolls her eyes as if to say, "Why did I even need to ask?") Joshua: So, I opened it and popped it into my mouth expecting it to be a root beer candy, but it tasted a little weird. So, I looked at the wrapper and sure enough it is a Dad's Root Beer Cough Drop. Isn't that awesome? Sara: Why? Joshua: Because they make root beer cough drops! I think it came from Walgreens. Sara: We have credit there. Do you want me to get you some? Not only has she accepted the fact that she is married to someone who will eat something they found on the ground, but she immediately offers to supply me with more of the item I ate! I don't think it gets any better than that.

Tuesday, August 22, 2006

"Let's use this knife to try and pry out the other knife" Current mood:The skeleton is cold at night I saw the Ballad of Ricky Bobby and it was good. My cheeks are still sore from all the laughing (I feel the need to emphasize that I am talking about the cheeks on my face). Sara enjoyed the movie enough to want to give Anchorman another try. We topped the day off with a wonderful meal at Fatburger. I had a King burger with chili, but decided that I will not have chili in the future. I like the chili(but it is not close to being as good as Tommy's), but I think what makes Fatburger so good are the other condiments that they have. It seemed like the chili was trying to distract my tastebuds from the really good stuff. I thought that I was happy with a new station on the FM dial, but I may be wrong. Sara's favorite station was KZLA(93.9). I say was, because it is no longer in operation. That wanna be country garbage they were playing was replaced by a station now going by the name Movin or Grovin or something along that line. I thought I would be happy because Sara has found great joy in my heartache over 103.1. 103.1 has been my favorite station at least three different times and has been disposed of each time. It used to play electronica and then rock en espanol and then alternative, and currently plays indie music, but it just isn't the same. Sara seemed to find humor in this at the time, but now karma has shown it's ugly face and she is without her favorite station. I set all the presets in the car to 93.9 to remind her of KZLA's non existence, which she didn't appreciate. So, I listened to it the other day and they played Daft Punk, Shakira, and Grand Master Flash all in a row. I thought that it was a station that I could grow to like until I heard the advertisement that Rick Deez was going to be doing their morning show. We all know that if you add too much of Deez to anything, it turns out being horrible.

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Election Day Current mood:Missing my hair Another Election Day is upon us. I am so glad that it is finally here, so I can not vote and then be able to experience normal commercials. I have voted only once in my life, to try and get Gary Coleman into the Governor's office. I don't believe in the voting process too much. I don't trust polititians and would only be voting for the lesser evil. I did find Cruz Bustamante's ad campaign to be very good. He says that since he lost 70 lbs., I should vote for him. Why not? After all, I am sure that weight loss is an important factor in my insurance prices. It's just as good as the reasons other candidates give me to vote for them. I hate the commercials where one candidate rips the other candidate. I would like to hear them tell me why I should vote for them instead of why I shouldn't vote for their opponent. The day I see that will probably be the day I make it out to the polls again. Good thing that John Kerry isn't up for election this year. That guy is a major douche. I'm sure all the military is very proud that he served in the Vietnam War. Back to Cruz Bustamante's weight loss. You shouldn't vote for me, because I have been pushing 2 bills on the scale lately. I weighed in at 197.4 today, which is the lowest I have been in a few weeks. I broke the 200 barrier the day of our office taco eating tournament. I ate 11 carne asada tacos and 1 chicken taco from King Taco in 30 minutes, only to take 2nd place by 1/2 a taco. I put on 3 pounds in that 1/2 hour. If 12 tacos doesn't seem like alot, I challenge you to try it. I don't mind weighing that much, because it is a pretty ideal weight for my height, but it seems like all the weight I have put on is flubber and not muscle. I would post a picture of my gut on here, but terms in my modeling contract prohibit me from showing my belly button. You will just have to use your imagination. I can attribute my gain to a few things. I know that playing basketball once a week really doesn't count as enough exercise to drop the fat that I am now intaking. My wife can make some very tasty meals, but I think the factor that contributes the most is all the good food that these fast food places make. I don't know how Jared lost all those pounds, but he must not have been eating "The Joshua" meatball special. If you are not familiar with The Joshua, it is just your typical meatball sub on white bread with white cheese, lettuce, pickles, olives, mustard, mayo, salt & pepper, and topped off with avacado. I am thinking of adding honey mustard to it one of these days too. Doesn't that sound healthy? Along with that tasty treat, Jack-In-The-Box (or as Mike would say Barf-In-The-Bag) has come out with The Outlaw Burger. It feels so good when it hits your lips. It is a cheese burger with onion rings, bacon, and bbq sauce. I think it is for a limited time, so don't miss out. I also enjoyed a Tops Special last week. It never disappoints. It is a cheese burger engulfed in pastrami, with strategically placed mustard. Add to that the fact that Wendy's has a new Wild Buffalo Ranch sauce, that burns so good on their chicken nuggets, and I am in major trouble. If that wasn't enough, the McRib is back! I don't know who is conspiring to chunk me up, but they win. I can only withstand so much temptation.

In Case You Missed It

Thursday, June 08, 2006

Recap and brilliance Current mood: tired I took my CPA exam last week and spent about a month of studying leading up to it. When I force my brain to work that much, it tries to distract me and get me thinking about other things. Here are some of the things that crossed my mind during that time. People on Jeopardy are rarely attractive, but they are very smart. They were smart enough at an early age to realize that they weren't going to get by on their looks, so they focussed on learning. To support my theory I thought about Who Wants to be a Millionare? The contestants on that show are a little more comforting to look at. This is because they have narrowed it down to multiple choice. However, you will notice that the smart people on that show are usually not very hot either. I love to watch Jeopardy when a category comes up that deals with sports or pop culture. They avoid it until the very end and then you have three ugly people looking back and forth waiting for somebody else to get it wrong. It makes me think that they really missed out on some good times growing up. I also thought about how good corned beef tastes with mustard on it. I thought that Dave Grohl should be the next Neil Young. He plays all kinds of instruments. Free Fishing Day is this Saturday. You can go fishing without a license. I also found myself craving Sliders from Claim Jumper. That made me wish that we had a White Castle on the west coast. I wondered why music stores don't have download kiosks. It would increase foot traffic in the store and also allow sales that you previously didn't get. Maybe they do and I just haven't been in enough stores. How did the leaders of the terrorists avoid from having to blow themselves up? Did they call in sick or did they say they were allergic to explosives? I wonder if we will ever track down Krauser's twin. It would be a trip to get them side by side for a picture. Is it wrong for me to be bothered by a guy with a sign that says, "Will work for food" standing next to a guy selling oranges? And at what point do you just accept the idea of being homeless? I think some of them just like the outdoors. I think that Doug Collins is the Tim McCarver of basketball. Why hasn't Shaq broken any baskets since his rookie season? I could go on and on with all of the wonderful things that went through my head besides how much of a scope limitation would lead to a disclaimer of opinion on the financial statements, but I will save more for another day. Happy Thursday!

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

SIX TWENTY! Current mood:Space Ghost rules! I do not like Nicolas Cage as an actor. It seems like he would be a cool guy to hang out with, but I just can't take his acting. I have liked movies with him in them, but the movies have been good in spite of him and not because of him. I painfully watched "The Weatherman" last night. It was horrible! I knew from the previews that people threw stuff at him, and thought that would make the movie entertaining enough to watch, but it was just unbelievably not good. I don't know how I lasted through the whole movie. I just kept thinking that there would be more stuff thrown at Cage and that would make it worth it. He did get hit with more stuff, and I enjoyed that, but it just wasn't worth it. After having seen that I discovered that I do like to see people getting hit with food. I guess I knew that before, but it just reinforced my belief. I would probably sit and watch a t.v. show that just involved hitting people with food. Maybe they could yell something like, "People are starving in China!" right before they threw the food. Now I know what to pitch to FOX next time I am there. I received a jury duty notice and will have to call in next month sometime to see if they need me. I remember in my single days that I wanted to serve jury duty real bad, but never got a notice. Now that I have a family to support, I get a notice every year. I think they should see who is at home watching Judge Judy and make them do jury duty. The rule should be that if it stays on that channel for more than 5 minutes, you get a phone call and have to report the next day. They already like watching it, and don't have anything better to do in the middle of the day. The government is already listening to our phone calls, so why not look at what we are watching? I got to share father's day with Skyler's birthday and Cooper's first steps, but still got candy out of the deal so it was a good day. We have basketball tomorrow and I may just whip out the "white tornado". Be afraid, be very afraid. In about 2 weeks I will be fishing. It has been a long time since that last time I went. I am really looking forward to it. I will have a chance to teach Kyle how to fish. It should be very beneficial to him. Last Comic Standing is on tonight and I have been wondering if people hang out with disabled people on purpose. Like does somebody befriend a guy with cerebal palsy to add to the list of ailments that their friends have? If so, good on them. Maybe we should all do that. Like a friend scavenger hunt. Just have a list of types of people you need to befriend. I have also been thinking that you don't really see a lot of homeless midgets. Is it because there is a low ratio of midgets to regular sized people? I think it is because midgets can always find some kind of work. I also think that if they did become homeless, they could go live in a miniature golf course. They would have to deal with balls going through their windmill every so often, but that is a small price to pay in exchange for free rent. Did I mention that I was given a copy of some old episodes of Land of the Lost? That show is awesome. It was incredible to watch it again. That show actually expected to kids to be interested in a more complex plot than a coyote chasing a roadrunner off of a cliff. It looks pretty cheesy by today's standards, but was one of my favorite shows back in the day. Speaking of my favorite shows, why do we not have 90210 out on DVD yet? I constantly find myself remembering life's lessons learned from 90210, yet do not have a reference point to go back and review. I know I am not the only one out there waiting for Brandon, Dylan, Kelly, Donna, Brenda, Steve, David Silver, and the cowboy dude who shot himself to come into my home. Or am I?

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Test your mute button Current mood: bouncy The wife and I saw Pirates on Saturday. I rank the first movie in my top ten favorite movies, so it would be difficult for this one to be better in my eyes. It wasn't better. I hate when they make movies knowing that they are going to have one follow the current one. They don't make a huge effort to have the movie stand on it's own, and try and force you to watch the next movie. The Matrix Reloaded did that and I never went back to see the 3rd movie. The movie was good because Johnny Depp is a good actor doing weird characters and the special effects were really good too. It just seemed a bit long, and just builds up to the next movie. All things considered, I am glad we went and saw it. I did notice Tivo's influence on me while in the theater. There would be parts that I didn't quite understand and my finger instinctively tried to hit the jumpback button. Maybe I need to see Click and figure out how to get that remote. I have been thinking about time travel lately, and have come to the conclusion that it isn't possible. This is because we would have people among us from the future. Unless they have uncovered the secret to invisibility? That should occupy my brain for the rest of the day. If anybody has tickets to see Pearl Jam tomorrow night and wants to take me, I am willing to make out with you.

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

People aren't very bright Current mood:I need to cut my nails So we are sitting in the theater and Pirates draws to a close to applause from the crowd. No, I was not at the premier. No, one of the actors was no present, or anyone involved in the movie at all. So, why are they clapping? Was it the guy running the projector's first time, and all of the audience were friends of his? What a waste of noise. I have discussed this with people in my office and they have been to shows where people clap at the beginning of the movie. What is wrong with people? To add to my state of amusement with people's stupidity, I saw a commercial on T.V. yesterday while muting through the all-star game. It was for Exxon Mobil and the slogan at the end of the commercial was, "We are drivers too". Seriously? Is that supposed to make me feel better about gas prices? That is like somebody who got their pinky cut-off saying, "I'm an amputee too" to somebody who lost both their arms. You are a driver too? Good for you, but I think the business you are in enables you to afford gas prices a little bit better than the rest of us. Go pump yourself Exxon!

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

It's been a while Current mood:Charles in Charge I think my Tivo is trying to tell me something. It constantly records "The Cosmetic Surgery Show". I have never watched a minute of this show, but it continues to show up on my Tivo suggestions list. I know that I just had a birthday, but why would Tivo rub it in. And it tries to trick me into thinking it really knows me. For example, it records Plazo Sesame instead of Seasame Street. It is as if Kenji (which is the name we gave our Tivo) is trying to say, "I know that Seasame Street is in your native language, but I also know you speak Spanish and may want to practice". Kenji needs to stop messing with my head. While I am thinking about technology, I wonder how much longer it will take before cars come equiped with the power to play your mp3's from your computer? It can't be too far away. We already have Onstar and navigational systems. I doubt that the technology to transmit mp3's from a satellite account is that much different. I think that would be more important than a navigational system. At least then you can enjoy the extra time spent driving all over the place. I am starting to fear our children. Cooper can walk pretty good now and she is strong as an ox. We have one of those gates in the doorway to keep her out of our room and she just walked up to it the other day and pulled it right down. She then proceeded to utter loud grunts as if she was taunting us. She is really smart too. When we pray with the kids at night she already knows to fold her arms and says amen over and over again throughout the prayers. Sometimes I don't blame her. Skyler can be pretty heavy-winded. Speaking of Skyler, this is what she said to me the other day, "Madison is like a warm egg". She was insinuating that Cooper is spoiled. I have no idea where she gets this stuff from, but she is very sly. If you add Geronimo to the mix, then we are already outnumbered. Plus, he doesn't think much about his personal safety, so we have that to fear too. So they have smarts(Skyler), muscle(Cooper), and crazy(Geronimo). I swear there are times when I walk into their play room and interupt their plans to overthrow us. It's just a matter of time. Maybe Sara and I need to produce an ally to even up the numbers. This is going to be a long blog. A couple weeks ago I woke up one morning and could not raise my left arm without immense pain. I went to the doctor to see what the deal was. I hadn't done anything strenuous or injured it during my run in the naked rodeo the previous night. So I get an appointment and go in later that day, which was a Friday. The doctor comes in and asks me whats wrong and touches my shoulder for a couple of seconds and then says he thinks it is a torn rotator cuff. Since I was there I decided to tell him that I had been having minor problems with my knee as well. So he touches it for a second or two and says that since he was going to send me to an orthapedic surgeon anyway, to just have it checked out then. I think that is the first time in my history of going to the doctor that I haven't had to remove an article of clothing. It's not like I love being naked or anything, but I just think that if I have a problem with my shoulder you may want to have me take off my shirt so you can check for swelling or discoloration. He just felt my knee through my jeans. So, I scheduled an appointment with the orthapedic surgeon for the next Friday. On Wednesday morning I woke up and the problem was gone. I still don't know what happened, but the orthapedic surgeon agreed that I was just fine. Although, it is hard for me to accept his prognosis without having removed any of my clothes. I am not a big cat fan and have a huge fear of dogs, so my kids can look forward to not having them as pets. I did a little research the other day and found a solution to the pet problem: miniature horses! They are awesome! And through my research I have found that they are pretty cheap to maintain and can live in your backyard. We discussed getting one as an office pet, but ultimately decided against it. We also thought that a miniature giraffe would be a million times cooler than a miniature horse. Hopefully they have them by the time we move into our own house.

Modern Day Airhorn

I thought this post might be appropriate for today:

Wednesday, May 10, 2006

Modern Day Airhorn Current mood:Smoks Farnov Last weekend the Mrs. and I saw United 93. It wasn't the greatest film I have ever seen, but I left the theater thinking that it was a good thing to see. Some interesting tidbits about the film are that a lot of the air traffic controlers play themselves in the film, I believe that the makers of the film consulted with the families of the victims and the families gave their consent to make the movie, and David Rasche plays one of the passengers. If you don't know who David Rasche is, he played Sledge Hammer in the classic T.V. show of the same name. The two roles aren't exactly similar, but it was good to know that he is still alive. The film seems like a documentary and the parts that the writers had to create seemed to be pretty convincing. It is one of the few movies that I have gone to fully knowing how it is going to end, but throughout the movie you hope that it will be different. After seeing the film it brought back the memory of hearing the air horn being tested on Saturday mornings. When I was younger I remember hearing that horn on a consistent basis. Being young and unfamiliar with the purpose of the horn, I had to be told that it was used in the past to warn the people of a possible air raid during war times. I was also told of curfews and the evening blackouts to hide the coast from night attacks by the enemy. Those air horn tests on Saturday mornings served as a reminder of how things were during war time. I wonder if those sounds made people grateful for the country we live in and for the military that fight to maintain our freedoms and try and protect the rest of the world. I don't hear those air horns anymore. Perhaps we have better technology, or we are confident that our coast isn't threatened. But I do think that it is interesting how little time has passed since the terrorist attacks, yet the gravity of that day seems to have already lost its luster. The film brought back the memory of that day along with the emotions and confusion as to why something like this happens. That day is one of those historic days, similar to the assassination of JFK and Pearl Harbor, that everyone seems to remember where they were when it all went down. I was still in college and happened to turn on the T.V. before leaving for class. I remember the feeling of not believing what I was seeing. I remember feeling anger towards the people who did this and I also remember how satisfied I felt when our President said that this act would not go unpunished. Today my ears are filled with a different kind of noise. They ring with constant complaints about the fact that we are at war and the government in general. It never ceases to amaze me that our society can find a complaint with just about anything. I am very grateful for those who serve our country and who have chosen to put their lives on the line for my freedom. I actually wanted to see this film on its opening weekend, because a % of the proceeds were going to a charity, but didn't make it out. I was also torn about actually going to see the film, because I have a problem with people making money off of tragedy. I have the same problem with people making money off of religion. Speaking of religion, I felt the most interesting part of the film was to see the passengers praying at the back of the plane and the terrorists praying at the same time at the front of the plane. If that isn't irony, then I don't know what is. I am not going to give a recommendation to go see the film, or tell you not to go see it. If you do plan to see it, remember what kind of movie it is and make sure you see it with a full belly. (The Mrs. felt sick to her stomach.) I think that is all I have to say about that.

Recycled Blog

Here are some more "highlights" from my early blogging days:

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

the weather Current mood: groggy Probably behind people who can't drive, the weather is one of my greatest pet peeves. I don't understand how people in Southern California can really even claim to have weather. What are the possibilities? It will either be sunny, cloudy, or it may rain. It really isn't that complex, yet we get to see the "weather" live from the new Doppler 56,000! I thought they had it right with the Doppler 50,000 but those extra 6,000 really make a difference. And if that isn't bad enought, we have "weather people" who go on the news and predict the "weather". The sad thing is that they are wrong all of the time. It isn't like we are dealing with snowstorms or tornados here. And what is with the %'s. Is there really that much of a difference between a 20% chance of rain and a 30% chance? At what % should we bring our umbrellas? And why don't we hold these people accountable when they get it wrong? I saw previews for the movie The Weatherman and it looked like people were throwing stuff at Nicholas Cage. I am actually tempted to see the movie just to see him get hit with stuff, but maybe we should implement the same system of accountability. What other job is there that you can predict a huge change in the atmosphere and cause people to make adjustments accordingly and then be totally wrong and have your error disregarded? And do we need them to change their names to help us realize what they do? There is a local guy here with the name Dallas Raines. O.K. we get it, you do the "weather". I think I would like to throw a bowl of hot chili at Nicholas Cage.

Monday, April 10, 2006

Ima Robot Current mood: quixotic I know it has been a week, but with tax season going full throtle I haven't had a chance to tell everyone how awesome Ima Robot was last Tuesday. Jed, Krauser and myself met Kato down in Hollywood to catch the show. It was at the House of Blues and it would probably be cheaper to have your car towed away than to pay for the parking, but at least the tickets were a deal. The show was put on by Indie Radio, which I think must be broadcast from Nevada as staticy as it is. Ima Robot was the headline and Everybody Else, The Spores and Gram Rabbit preceeded them. We missed just about all of Everybody Else's set, but from the free cd we got, they seem to be pretty good. The Spores and Gram Rabbit were definately something to experience once. They consisted of a series of puppet shows and people dressed up as bunnies. They obviously are very popular judging by all the celebrities we saw in the crowd. We saw Carrottop, Corey Maggette, Short Round and even Mr. Hayes was there from high school. It was good to know that he is still sticking with the mustache after all these years. They always say that true happiness can be found right under your nose. I guess you can tell that we had a little free time before the Robot experience. When they finally came out, it was well past midnight, but they made it well worth staying up past my bedtime. They played a few of their newer songs, including my new favorite, "creeps me out". They also played just about all of the great songs from the old album. I would have liked to have heard "A is for action", but the cover of Eddie Murphy's "My girl wants to party all the time" was an ample replacement. Krauser and Kato weren't familiar with Ima Robot before the show, but I think they both enjoyed themselves. Their new album has been rumored to be coming out for quite a while now. Hopefully it comes out sometime soon. I did score an ep after the show to help tide me over for a little bit. I really wanted to get a new shirt there, but they had no merchandise. After that we went on to my first and last internet cafe. The place was packed with people at like 2 a.m. instant messaging and what not. Coincidently, we didn't see any females there. We went to a Subway instead, which I think doubled as a homeless shelter because there was quite a few of them coming and going. It was an overly enjoyable experience and I look forward to seeing them perform again in the near future. I think I missed out on the whole concert thing in my early years. It seems like it would have been a good time, but the concert tickets always seemed too expensive to me. Maybe in my next life, I will be a roadie. Mr. Sasquatch is now over, and I came up empty this year. The competition did improve since last time and I think next year will have an even better turn out. I also went to Disneyland twice last week. I went with Skyler on Wednesday and Sara on Thursday. Their passes have now expired, so it will be a few months before we go back. I was never really into Disneyland growing up, but now that we have kids it is really fun. The kids love it and I like to see them have fun. Sara and I met up with my parents Thursday evening and went on Tower of Terror at California Adventure. That ride was awesome! We didn't know what to expect and that made it even better. As I was in the middle of 7 hours of working on a client's data today, the thought occurred to me that it probably would suck for a musician to give birth to a deaf child. I don't think it would be the equivalent of a good looking person having a blind kid, or a chef having a kid with no sense of smell. Do they put music notes on the closed captioning for the deaf people who knew what music was and then lost their hearing? It's time for me to go to bed. Popozao!

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Test your mute button Current mood: bouncy Tonight is the MLB All-Star Game, which means that Tim McBlabber and Joe Butt will be vomitting on the microphone. They are almost enough to keep me from watching baseball on Fox. We got back from our Utah vacation this weekend. We went fishing every day and fished a different spot just about everyday. It gave us some variety. It was pretty good. I really liked catching bass up at Jordanelle. The wife and I saw Pirates on Saturday. I rank the first movie in my top ten favorite movies, so it would be difficult for this one to be better in my eyes. It wasn't better. I hate when they make movies knowing that they are going to have one follow the current one. They don't make a huge effort to have the movie stand on it's own, and try and force you to watch the next movie. The Matrix Reloaded did that and I never went back to see the 3rd movie. The movie was good because Johnny Depp is a good actor doing weird characters and the special effects were really good too. It just seemed a bit long, and just builds up to the next movie. All things considered, I am glad we went and saw it. I did notice Tivo's influence on me while in the theater. There would be parts that I didn't quite understand and my finger instinctively tried to hit the jumpback button. Maybe I need to see Click and figure out how to get that remote. I have been thinking about time travel lately, and have come to the conclusion that it isn't possible. This is because we would have people among us from the future. Unless they have uncovered the secret to invisibility? That should occupy my brain for the rest of the day. Mark you calendar, J5 comes out with a new album on the 25th. If anybody has tickets to see Pearl Jam tomorrow night and wants to take me, I am willing to make out with you.

Facebook Wins!

A long time ago in an internet far, far away I utilized a thing called MySpace. In the beginning it was good. As time passed it was attacked by spam and too many people taking pictures of themselves in the mirror. It wasn't the worst thing in the world, but there was one feature that caused me to stop frequenting it: My blog. In the early days of me filling the internets with my thoughts, it used to be through MySpace. As my frustration grew with the limited access for outsiders and whole posts being lost in internet space, I eventually came to know Blogger. Then Facebook came along and stole my heart. Why is this important to you? Because, you may not be aware that there have been previous blog posts not on this blog. And, you may not be aware that I have set next Tuesday as the day I delete my MySpace account, denying you the opportunity to ever see those blog posts again (no need to cry about it). For this reason I am including this link for you to check out the previous blog posts before they are gone. I promise that if you read them, your eyes will probably still work afterward.

As an added service to you, I will be posting highlights from the former blog up until next Tuesday. I figured that today I would begin with the blog post that started it all:

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

General Mills Current mood: curious What branch of the service did General Mills serve in? I bet that he was involved in preparing meals in some sort of capacity. I also think that he somehow became a 4 star general and utilized that in his future profession as a restaurant critic. We can probably thank him for the whole star grading system. Along with his many magically delicious breakfast cereals. Why isn't this guy featured on the History Channel?

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Cialis
Current mood: cynical

Is it just me, or do these ads for medicine keep getting more and more ridiculous? "Hi, I have genital herpes" Really, thanks for sharing that with the whole world. I know that you are an actor, but now you will be known as the actor from the herpes commercial. That isn't even the worst. Do you ever listen to all the possible side effects of these drugs? "Some of the side effects of this bowel medication may be worse diarreah, bloody stool, serious itching, and possible death" How many people are thinking that their diarreah is so bad that they are willing to risk death to get their bowels back to normal? And finally what about those erectile dysfunction drugs? The ad says "erections lasting longer than 4 hours should seek immediate medical attention" Their are so many wrong things about that statement. First of all, who sets a timer when the troops start to stand at attention. Secondly, I would think that the possibility of having to go to the emergency room with that problem would be embarassing enough to deter people from using the drug. Can you imagine that conversation:
Receptionist: What are you here for today sir?
Mr. Over 4 hours: I really don't want to say it out loud.
Receptionist: Well then just lean over the counter and whisper your problem to me.
Mr. Over 4 hours: I am trying, but I can't get close enough.
Receptionist: Why, is something in your way? Oh, now I see the problem. Go sit down and put a coat in your lap. The doctor will see you in a minute.

And then I am thinking what the doctor is going to do.
Doctor: O.K. Mr. Over 4 hours, don't worry I have seen this problem before. Go sit in room 4. Nurse, go get the video of the 300 pound guy eating Fritos in the nude for Mr. Over 4 hours to watch in room 4.

Set the Alarm

It has been quite a while since I last discussed my progress in watching Dawson's Creek. I am now 2 discs away from being done. I think that my opinion of the show has changed since I put the first disc in, but I will save my final review for when I am done watching it all. However, I was very surprised to be watching an episode recently and seeing Seth Rogen make a guest appearance as Bob. He looked exactly the same as he does today. In this episode he ends up joining Joey, Eddie and Audry for a road trip to California. Whilst on said trip Bob falls asleep in the car and ends up letting one rip while he slept.

This may seem like a small thing to you, but you probably haven't been wondering for months if people call that sleep farting. May I suggest using a different, more medical sounding term: Narcofartsy? Used in a sentence: Billy didn't want to share a tent with Tom, because Tom suffered from Narcofartsy.

While I am on the subject of things that people do while sleeping, let me share with you a problem that I have been having (No, I don't suffer from Narcofartsy. And, that doesn't seem like a problem. You release funky smelling gas and don't have to suffer through the smell. Where's the problem?) However, I have been having more trouble sleeping lately.

A couple months ago I happened to catch an episode of Dateline:

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I've been a little freaked out ever since. The show focused on a case of homicidal somnambulism, which is the act of killing someone while sleepwalking. You might think that it isn't a big deal, but you might also not know of my history of being around people who do things in their sleep.

Growing up, there was the incident of one of my brothers treating the homework of another brother like a toilet in the middle of the night. Jed didn't even attempt to use that excuse with his teacher the next day.

As a missionary, I still vividly remember being awoken by the sound of Elder Roberts (names may or may not have been changed to protect identities) sitting up in his bed screaming insults and obscenities about me. This happened more than once and he claimed not to know anything about it the next morning.

And now I am married to a woman who is famous for the story of her walking out of her house, down the street, knocking on the neighbor's door and trying to return her library books, all while sleeping. I've had my fair share of conversations with sleeping Sara and admit to being quite irritated when she claims to have never talked about the things we did. I've figured that it was just one of those little things that come with the whole marriage package, but until seeing Dateline didn't realize how much danger I may be in. Add in the fact that all of our little ones have been known to talk, wander and abuse me in their sleep (I've already been kicked in the face and crotch while I sleep), and my mattress could possibly be a death trap.

So, I've been left with the dilemma of what to do to avoid being a victim of a sleeping slayer. I could possibly sleep in body armor and a helmet. Or, maybe some sort of a protective chamber. I wonder if I could strap some sort of devices to the sleepers that would shock them when they got too close to my sleeping body. While all of these ideas seem brilliant, they also fall outside of my sleeping security budget. If anyone has any of these items that they would be willing to donate to a good cause, let me know. I'm also willing to listen to other suggestions. Until then, I guess I will just invest in a lot of Visine and hope that I can contract a case of Narcofartsy powerful enough to keep sleepwalkers away. Wish me luck.

First Day of School (A Father's Point of View)

So, I partook in "First Day of School" festivities again this year(which usually consists of me taking pictures of the kids in the morning). As far as I can remember, I have done this every year since Skyler first started (Feel free to correct me, Mrs. Mustachio).I think my main purpose in doing this is to avoid hiring somebody else to take the pictures, because in all honesty the kids going to school doesn't really affect me that much.

When I go to the school on the first day I will see a few other fathers who have been convinced to partake in the festivities as well. No words are spoken between us, but a head nod usually conveys the message of, "You too, huh?" I have never spotted a father who is stoked about being a part of the first day of school.

Then comes the worst part: Seeing all of the sobbing mothers. I just don't get it. Not only that, the poor little kids see their moms getting all teary-eyed and they think they are being sent off to some horrible place. (This may be where a child's dislike of school develops). Then they start bawling. I don't know if this was just some ploy that the tissue companies came up with years ago, but I don't understand the whole crying on the first day of school thing.

Granted, I could possibly understand a little bit if it is in fact "the very first day" of school ever for any of your children. But if you are crying about dropping off your 2nd grader or your 5th child, then there is some sort of a problem. I started thinking about what the possible causes of the tears might be, and here is what I came up with:

1. The parents don't speak the language very well and have mistakenly thought that there is a chance that the school will actually keep their child. Those are usually the parents who are waiting anxiously at the end of school to see if their child gets released back to them. I have to assume that this would only occur for the first child going to school. After a few months of getting their kid back, they should realize their misunderstanding.

2. The parents realize that they are going to have to do homework again. I've never been a big fan of homework, and I think most of us feel a huge relief when our homework days are over. Except, we forget about the future homework we would have to be doing for/with our children. That first day of school probably brings the new era of homework to light and can cause some women to be moved to tears. Most dads aren't as involved in the homework process, so they are spared the wet eyes.

3. The parents have never left their child alone with anyone else. Seriously, why else would you be crying? It's not like you aren't getting the kid back in a few hours(unless you fall in the category of #1). Have you never used the service of a babysitter before? If anything, the teacher should be the one crying. They are the ones having to try and round up a class room full of crazy kids and try and teach them something.

4. The parents realize that their chore expectations have increased. Whoever is staying at home now has less responsibility with the kid being off at school. They now realize that their spouse might be expecting a house that is a little cleaner or a few less "projects" to do when they get home.

5. The parents can't deal with their age. Seeing your kid go to school may help you realize that you are in fact getting old. Guess what. It happens to everyone. Get over it already. What did you expect, some medical miracle that would stop people from getting older. Old people everywhere are evidence that you will be old too. Crying about it isn't going to change anything.

6. The parents realize that the belief of them knowing everything is about to be destroyed. It will only be a matter of time before the child brings home some jacked up word problem that leaves you stumped. The parent is crying just thinking about that future occurrence when the words, "I don't know" will be uttered. Which in turn will make, "Because I said so" less acceptable to your child.

I'm sure there are many other reasons, but those are the ones I could come up with (feel free to add to the list). I don't know that any of those reasons are worth crying over. I guess it is harder for me to understand because it doesn't change my routine much. I still get up and go to work before they have to go to school and come home after they do. There is some kind of unwritten understanding when it comes to homework. The kids seem to know that I don't want to bother them with what goes down at work each day. They in turn, don't seem to want to talk about what homework was done or wasn't done while I was gone. It is a pleasant understanding. Maybe that is my reward for being the first day of school photographer?