Sunday, November 30, 2008

Black Friday

For some unknown reason I have subjected myself to the chaos called "Black Friday" for several of the past years. I have had numerous memorable experiences on that day(i.e. being rammed by an old lady's cart, physically grabbing two old men trying to cut in line and pulling them behind me while entering the store, and enjoying a delightful morning at Kohl's last year), but there is one story that everyone in my family seems to enjoy most. Perhaps I will share that story at the end of this post.

This year I had almost all of my Christmas shopping done before Black Friday. After looking at the ad's on Thursday, I didn't see much that would make me need to subject myself to the pandemonium. My brother, Kyle, was in town for the holiday. He, Jed, and I decided to go fishing early Friday morning instead. We went to the San Gabriel River. We usually keep track of how many fish each of us catch. I should have known from the moment I met up with Jed and Kyle that they would be trying to sabotage me throughout the day.

The plan was for Jed to pick up Kyle at his in-laws and then meet up with me at the LDS church parking lot before heading up the hill. I called Jed when I was on my way to the rendezvous point and he mentioned that he was at the Jack-in-the-box just north of the freeway off-ramp. I asked him to pick me up a chicken sandwich and he agreed. I got to the parking lot first and waited for them to arrive. I saw their car and exited my vehicle. As they pulled up, Kyle rolled down his window and flung something in my direction. As I watched the object explode as it impacted with the concrete I realized it was my chicken sandwich. I still don't understand why Kyle would pull a chicken sandwich drive-by. After all, I was going to be getting in their car in just a few short minutes. I hadn't expressed to him that my life depended on immediately eating the chicken sandwich. My only theory is that it was strategy to try and get in my head and prevent me from dominating them in our fishing battle. If that was the reason, it failed miserably. I was one fish away from catching as many fish as the two of them combined. This was all despite their numerous efforts to try and take me out. Jed whacked me across the face with his fishing rod (he tried to pretend he slipped and fell in the water right behind me as he did it, but I know better now). Kyle even got to the point that he was whipping my rod with his as I was trying to reel in a fish. Despite their efforts, I had an enjoyable time showing them how to catch fish and debating whether we are human or dancer. I'm not exactly sure, but I think San Gabriel must mean trash in Mexican because it is always filled with a ton of garbage and there is graffiti everywhere. Jed even helped lead us to a dead skunk floating in the water. It was a symbolic skunk of how Jed's fishing day was up to that point.

After fishing we headed back to our families and met up at my parents' house. We agreed to have Thanksgiving dinner on Friday this year to enable everyone to spend Thursday with their in-laws, and to allow us to spend more time together on Friday. After arriving we got everyone together at Butterfield Park to take some family pictures. Then we were treated to a delicious feast. My belly is always grateful for my mother's cooking. We participated in some watching of basketball, some Xbox, and filling in the blanks to a Thanksgiving story. The funniest story seemed to be one filled out by Your Friend. It was a great day, and an enjoyable break from my normal Friday routine.

As an ode to posting too much information on the Internet, here is my Black Friday story:

A couple years back I was in line at Toys-R-Us waiting for the doors to open. I like hitting there first because they usually open before the time that is printed in the ads, the store is organized for a nice flow of people through the store, and the other shoppers aren't very hostile. They don't usually have too many outrageous deals, but I usually complete all of my shopping for the nieces and nephews there. I arrived there about an hour before they were supposed to open. I noticed some people I knew at the front of the line, but in my anti-social fashion didn't say hello. It was cold out, but I had sweatshirt on and was quite comfortable. Just after I got into line, a swarm of people began to show up. The line quickly went past the adjoining businesses and around the corner. I was probably between the 20th and 30th in line. I had my ad in hand and was carefully reviewing my list, when I was reminded that I had enjoyed two huge Thanksgiving feasts the day before. I was reminded by my bowels deciding they wanted to move, and they didn't want to wait much longer to do so.

I didn't know what to do. The store was getting ready to open, and there wasn't going to be enough time to have someone hold my place while I searched frantically for a bathroom. At the same time, there were people there who knew me, and pooping myself would most likely get heavy rotation in the gossip chain. I decided to try and wait it out. I immediately began doing the "no poop" dance. I received some strange looks, but the dance seemed to be working. The doors opened, I grabbed my cart and dashed about the store to try and get the items I needed. All the while I was praying that I could make it through. My stomach was churning and I was getting close to having everything on my list. I needed one more thing from the electronics department. I saw a very long line that had formed around the inside of the store to get into that section and knew that I wouldn't make it through that line. At that point I saw the people that I knew headed in my direction. I made a quick turn down an isle and bolted for the registers. I unloaded my items as quickly as possible while still doing my dance. Drops of sweat were dripping down my forehead. I was so close to escaping without having an accident. They rung up the items. I swiped my card without even looking at how much I just agreed to pay and ran out of the store pushing my cart. I made it out! It was a very small victory in a huge war with my bowels. I threw the bags into the car and headed out the driveway. I was sure that I wouldn't make it home in time. As I drove I wondered if there was anything that would clean up my potential mess, or if I would have to drive the car to the junkyard. About that time I saw a gas station. While steering with one hand I unbuckled my belt with the other. I slammed the gas toward the bathroom, threw it in park and darted for the door(with my car still running and the door wide open). Luckily for me it was the first time in my life that a gas station bathroom door didn't require me to ask the cashier for a key. I flung the door open, dropped my pants and exploded. I now know why gas station bathrooms smell the way they do. I sat there relieved to have made it hoping that nobody would steal my car or presents or open the unlocked bathroom door. After spending a few minutes in the bathroom I headed home and spent the rest of the day making frequent trips from the bed to the bathroom.

Happy Holidays!

Happy Anniversary!

It has been exactly one year since my foot tried to break up with me. Luckily, we were able to stick together. However, our relationship will never be the same. I am reminded each morning of the pain the break up caused me. I also will never be able to completely trust my foot again. I'm not confident that it will be able to stand strong against major adversity. I guess I have to find solace in the fact that I would be much worse if the break up had been permanent.

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Deja Vu

I saw Coheed and Cambria perform again tonight. They have released 4 albums and are playing one per night. Tonight was my favorite of their albums and they didn't disappoint. Just like any other normal family, my family members call each other from the concerts that they are at. So, Kyle, Knick, Cyndi, Jed, Mike, and Debbie all got to enjoy a little bit of the concert. Prior to the concert Jed had requested hearing A Favor House Atlantic, but instead of calling I decided to grab a video of it for him. Here it is along with some pictures.


Kato is trying to set a new concert-going trend of wearing dress shoes and sweat-pants. Good luck with that Kato!

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Coheed & Cambria @ The Avalon

Enjoyed a nice quiet concert tonight. Here are some photos of the concert:



More can be found here. I enjoyed it so much, that I think I will do it again tomorrow. Same bat time, same bat channel.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Catching Up

A lot has happened in the last couple of weeks. Here is a brief photo summary:
Karyssa was baptized.These two look like future missionaries, or the next Will Ferrell and Owen Wilson. I still can't decide which.
T-ball is now over. Jackson's favorite games were played against his friend Lou.
We spent over an hour in line at the Glendale Galleria for Geronimo to meet the Power Rangers.

We spent Thursday with some of my cousins and their families at Disneyland. We were going non-stop and hit just about all of the good rides. In retrospect, I regret not riding Autopia, but we ran out of time.

Friday was Halloween. Here are the kids.
Bodie was Squirt from Finding NemoSkyler was Hannah Montana.
Geronimo was the blue Power Ranger.Madison was Cinderella. They went trick-or-treating with their cousins in my in-laws' neighborhood.Saturday was our ward Halloween Party. Geronimo decided to go as the Red Ranger for this one. My costume was quite popular.I spent almost all of Saturday helping set up the spook alley for our ward. It turned out pretty good, but I would have preferred spending my Saturday doing something else.
Monday we walked around the neighborhood and hung reminders to vote yes on prop 8 on door knobs.
I tried to get Bodie to show off his two new teeth, but he was being a little monster.We then headed off for a family dinner only to be met by this horrifying news. I'm not much of a crier, but I came awfully close to shedding tears. That should get you caught up.

I Voted


I went in the morning to my polling place and cast my votes, even though there isn't a Krispy Kreme close enough to get a free donut. You may have seen my prior voting choices here. I decided to vote NO on prop 5 and changed my vote to NO on prop 7.

I came to a decision on who to vote for as President a few days ago, and here are the results:
I didn't want to vote for Obama, because I think that the "change" he is going to make will not be a good one. I also had my reservations about McCain, but would have probably voted for him if I felt my vote counted in this state. I am not a fan of the Electoral College system of voting, and would be in favor of California distributing their votes proportionate to the results of the popular vote. My vote for McCain is worthless in California, so I decided to write somebody in. I chose Morgan Freeman. He is a great actor, so he would be good at hiding his emotions and stepping up to whatever role the presidency needs. But for the most part, I chose him as a good excuse down the road. When somebody complains about the president in a couple of years I can say, "Don't blame me. I voted for the black guy." or, "Don't blame me. I voted for the old guy." I went with Jedidiah Kelley as my Vice President, because I think he is most qualified to shoot his friends in the face(That is what the Vice President does, isn't it?). Some people may think that I am taking lightly my right to vote. I say that I am doing the exact opposite and exercising my right to vote for whoever I feel like. I did take the local propositions more seriously, and will be staying up to see the results of prop 8. I have found it interesting that it is claimed that the proposition has nothing to do with schools, yet the California Teachers Association is involved. Hope you voted.

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Something to Ponder

This is a very well stated argument for Yes on 8. Share this with your friends and colleagues.
Letter-to-the-Editor
October 27, 2008
By John Maxfield
Orange County Register
It is simply amazing how the "No on Prop. 8" campaign is unwilling to stand up for what it believes. For a week now the campaign has said one thing; yet it believes something else.

What do I mean? Well, the "No on Prop. 8" campaign maintains that, if Proposition 8 fails, kids will not be exposed to same-sex marriage instruction in school; yet it maintains that gay marriage is a fundamental right. Huh? If gay marriage is a fundamental right, then it should be taught in school. Can you think of another fundamental right that is not taught in school? The campaign's dirty little secret? They know gay marriage will be taught in school and they are desperate to say anything so that we don't figure it out on our own.

In an effort to make sure we don't figure this out, they have now paraded the state education chief, Jack O'Connell, out to say that schools don't have to teach about marriage. Sadly, Mr. O'Connell hasn't told the whole truth. According to California Education Code Section 51933, if a school decides to teach a comprehensive sex education class to K-12 graders (and which school district doesn't?), "Instruction and materials shall teach respect for marriage and committed relationships." Thus, marriage is taught in California schools.

Moreover, the California Safe Schools Coalition asserts that children will be taught in class about homosexuality and gender identity (read confusion). Please note that many of the members of the California Safe Schools Coalition are also supporters of the "No on Prop. 8" campaign, including the California Teachers Association, the ACLU (which actually argued in the Massachusetts case that the court should require the teaching of same-sex marriage in schools) and numerous other gay and lesbian organizations.

Interestingly, according to the coalition's Web site, the Capistrano Unified School District, Escondido Union High School District, Monterey Unified Peninsula School District, Palm Springs Unified School District, San Francisco Unified School District and the Ventura County Office of Education are all members of this coalition.

According to the coalition's Question and Answer Guide on California's Parental Opt-out Statutes, the coalition asserts that parents do not have the right to notice about and to opt their children out of diversity education programs that include discussions of sexual orientation or other controversial topics.

The coalition describes how a school district can develop a plan that will preclude parents from opting out of such teachings. According to the coalition, so long as the purpose and content of these diversity programs are "carefully articulated" and do not include sexually explicit content (i.e. discuss the human reproductive organs and their functions), parents are not entitled to prior notice and the opportunity to opt their children out.

In essence, the coalition's reasoning is precisely the same reasoning successfully used against the parents in the Massachusetts case where a federal appeals court held that the parents could not opt their kindergartner out of a class discussing tolerance of gay marriage. According to this reasoning, if Prop. 8 fails, same-sex marriage will be taught in schools.

We don't need to look any further than our own state to see how this will work. The implementation of this coalition's goals is already in progress in a charter school in Hayward. According to the Pacific Justice Institute, parents of a kindergartener at the Faith Ringgold School of Art and Science were shocked to see a poster announcing that "Coming Out Day" was to be celebrated at the school Oct. 23. The school chose not to tell parents ahead of time. The school is celebrating Gay and Lesbian History Month. During this celebration, the parents have noticed several posters promoting families, all of which depict only homosexual families.

Gay marriage will be taught in schools if Prop. 8 fails. Why doesn't the "No on Prop. 8" campaign come clean and say what it really believes will happen if Prop. 8 is defeated? If the campaign is so confident in its position that gay marriage is a fundamental right, then why lie? Now ask yourself: do you really want to support a campaign of this type of hypocrisy? If the answer is "no," then just vote "Yes" on Prop. 8.